Interpersonal skills rarely stand out when they’re used effectively. They become most apparent when things go wrong: an email comes across differently than intended, a meeting keeps circling back to the same point, or an employee remains silent when their input would actually be valuable.
Most organisations now recognise how important these skills are. Yet the same communication problems often keep recurring. Not because employees don’t want to learn, but because interpersonal skills are still too often disconnected from the situations in which people need them on a daily basis.
Anyone who truly wants to develop interpersonal skills must therefore look beyond a one-time workshop or theoretical training. The key lies in recognising relevant situations, practising in a targeted way, receiving feedback, and applying new behaviours in the workplace.
Interpersonal skills are the skills that determine how we communicate, collaborate and interact with others. They are also referred to as people skills, human skills, or interpersonal abilities.
Examples include:
active listening;
communicating clearly;
giving and receiving feedback;
dealing with disagreements and conflicts;
empathy and emotional intelligence;
persuading and influencing others;
collaborating;
presenting;
negotiating;
leading and coaching;
having difficult conversations.
These skills come into play constantly in our daily work. A manager guiding an employee, a colleague presenting a different point of view during a meeting, or an expert explaining a complex idea to non-specialists — they all rely on interpersonal skills.
What is often overlooked is that interpersonal skills never stand entirely on their own.
How we communicate is influenced by our language skills, our cultural background, the context in which we work, and how confident we are in speaking our minds.
A common mistake is to reduce interpersonal skills to observable behaviour. For example, we’re taught that we should listen actively, give constructive feedback, or share our opinions during a meeting.
But knowing what to do doesn’t mean you’ll do it automatically.
There are often other factors behind certain behaviours. Someone who says little during meetings may not have enough confidence to speak up. A manager who postpones feedback sessions may know perfectly well that feedback is important but feel uncertain about how to handle such a conversation. And someone who lacks persuasiveness during a presentation may simply need more practice and targeted feedback.
That’s why it’s not enough to simply tell employees what they can do better. Effective development also helps them understand what’s holding them back and gives them the opportunity to safely try out new behaviours.
Interpersonal skills rarely develop after just one training session or workshop. It’s more of a learning process in which employees are given various opportunities to learn, practise, receive feedback and apply what they’ve learned again.
Four elements make a significant difference in this process.
Not everyone has the same development needs.
A new manager conducting feedback sessions for the first time faces different challenges from a technical expert who regularly presents to clients. An employee working in a hybrid team, on the other hand, may struggle primarily with digital communication, remote collaboration or speaking up during online meetings.
That’s why effective training doesn’t start with a standard list of skills, but with the question:
What challenges does this employee face in their day-to-day work?
A good approach takes into account the employee’s role, responsibilities, experience, learning objectives and specific communication situations. This ensures the training is relevant from the very start.
Interpersonal skills don’t improve just because someone understands how they work. They improve when someone uses them. That’s why practice is an essential part of any effective training. Consider, for example:
realistic role-playing exercises;
conversations and situations from the employee’s own work environment;
interactive workshops;
coaching and personal guidance;
digital exercises between training sessions;
feedback from an experienced trainer;
reflection on situations that actually occur at work.
For example, an employee can first learn how to give constructive feedback. They can then practise a feedback conversation in a safe environment, receive feedback, and refine their approach in the next exercise.
In this way, theory gradually becomes behaviour.
A one-time classroom training session can be valuable, but a single learning opportunity is rarely enough to develop new behaviours in a sustainable way.
A combination of different learning methods offers more opportunities to reinforce skills:
Guided training provides structure, expertise and interaction.
Collaborative learning gives employees the chance to share experiences and learn from one another.
Digital learning activities make it possible to continue practising and refreshing knowledge between training sessions.
Coaching and feedback help employees refine their approach and apply it to situations that are personally relevant to them.
This combination also makes learning more flexible. For example, employees can review a specific skill before a difficult conversation or continue practising with a digital tool after a training session.
The success of a training programme isn’t determined solely by how many employees took the course or how many modules they completed.
The more important question is: What is changing on the job?
Perhaps a manager is conducting difficult conversations with more confidence. Perhaps employees are speaking up more readily during meetings. Perhaps there are fewer misunderstandings when teams collaborate.
Those kinds of changes say much more about the development of interpersonal skills than a participation or completion rate.
A training programme is only truly valuable when employees can apply what they’ve learned outside the classroom.
When communication problems arise, it’s tempting to immediately focus on a single specific skill. But the cause isn’t always where you’d expect it to be at first glance.
For example, an employee might have trouble speaking up during a meeting because they aren’t sufficiently familiar with the language of the meeting. A colleague might interpret feedback differently due to differences in communication style or expectations. And someone might know exactly how to approach a conversation but lack the confidence to put that into practice.
That’s why it’s helpful to consider three building blocks together:
Language is the foundation of much professional communication. An employee must not only know the right words but also understand nuances, be able to express themselves fluently, and adapt their language use to the situation.
Communication is also influenced by cultural expectations. How directly do you give feedback? How do you handle silences? How do you address a supervisor? What does “agreed” actually mean in different contexts?
Intercultural skills help employees better recognise such differences and deal with them flexibly.
On top of that are the skills that determine how we interact with others: listening, giving feedback, collaborating, influencing, negotiating, managing conflicts and leading.
These three areas reinforce one another. Anyone who wants to develop communication skills in a sustainable way would therefore be wise not to view them as completely separate from one another.
Those responsible for learning and development don’t need to tackle all communication skills within the organisation right away. A better first step is to identify where communication regularly runs into difficulties today.
These could include, for example:
meetings where employees provide little input;
feedback sessions that are postponed;
presentations to clients or senior management;
difficult conversations with employees;
collaboration between different teams;
digital communication via email, chat or video meetings;
collaboration between Dutch-, French- and English-speaking colleagues;
situations in which employees need to persuade or influence others;
new managers taking on their roles.
Ask employees what challenges they face. Discuss with managers which situations are difficult for their teams. Identify where misunderstandings, delays or uncertainty arise.
Start with the specific situation and then determine which skills are needed.
This usually results in more relevant learning objectives than starting with a general list of “soft skills”.
A good approach to interpersonal skills combines various elements.
For example, consider:
Personalisation
Does the training align with employees’ roles, experience, goals and specific work situations?
Practical learning
Do employees have sufficient opportunities to practise with situations they actually encounter on the job?
Personalised guidance
Is there an experienced trainer or coach who can provide feedback and help employees refine their approach?
Flexibility
Can employees continue to practise and learn between training sessions?
Follow-up
Is there a follow-up after the training to see if employees are actually applying what they’ve learned?
Measurable progress
Is the focus not only on participation and completion, but also on confidence, behaviour and application in the workplace?
The best approach isn’t necessarily the most comprehensive one. It’s mainly about finding the right combination of relevance, practice, guidance and follow-up.
The goal of interpersonal skills training is not to turn employees into perfect communicators.
It’s about giving them the knowledge, confidence and opportunities to practise so they can communicate and collaborate more effectively in various situations.
That takes time. Behaviour doesn’t change after just one workshop. But with targeted practice, personalised feedback and ample opportunities to apply new skills in real-world situations, small changes can grow into lasting improvements.
At BLCC, we therefore believe that effective development goes beyond the transfer of knowledge. We combine personalised guidance with hands-on practice and digital learning opportunities, tailored to the communication situations employees actually encounter on the job.
Whether it involves language proficiency, intercultural communication or interpersonal skills, the most valuable skills are those that employees can actually put to use when it really matters.
Curious about how we can support your organisation and your employees?
Feel free to contact us for more information or an introductory meeting.
Interpersonal skills are the skills that determine how people communicate, collaborate and interact with others. Examples include active listening, giving feedback, managing conflicts, negotiating, presenting and leading.
You develop interpersonal skills primarily through a combination of knowledge, practice, feedback and application in realistic work situations. A one-time training session is usually not enough to develop new behaviours in a sustainable way.
Knowing how to handle a particular communication situation does not automatically mean you’ll apply that behaviour in practice. By practising realistic situations and receiving feedback, employees can refine their approach and build more confidence.
Important skills include active listening, clear communication, giving and receiving feedback, collaboration, conflict resolution, negotiation, influencing, presenting, coaching and leadership.
“Soft skills” is a broad term for skills related to behaviour and collaboration. Interpersonal skills are an important part of this and focus specifically on how people communicate and collaborate with others.
Absolutely. Interpersonal skills are relevant to any organisation where people work together. Even without international operations, clear communication, feedback, collaboration, leadership and conflict resolution are essential for a well-functioning workplace.
*This blog is based on the original article “How to Teach Interpersonal Skills in the Workplace” by Learnlight. The article was translated, edited, and adapted to a Belgian context by BLCC.